what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

Cripples are lame.

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already taken her police statement and she doesn't want to discuss the incidentit anymore until her lawyer arrives.

Q. What do you call a small hen that can't lay eggs properly? A. A small hen that can't lay eggs properly.

What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

Dylan: "I dont understand anti-jokes"

How do you kill a blonde? You stab her many times in the ear with a fork......Then finsih her off with a spoon. No knives those hurts

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

I met a muslim girl the other day Shes the bomb

What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

alex and clayton are having sex at school. at that point, their teacher walks in and tells clayton about the dangers of unprotected sex.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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