What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

Why can't the black guy read? Because he's blind.

What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

Q. What did the woman use for vaginal medication? A. Standard Strength Vagisil.

why didnt the guy go to work one morning he died in a car accident

How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Duck, Duck who? Duck Sandwich

Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks: dude, what happened to your eye? The man replies: abuse.

Ten black people are on the 100th floor of a 110 floor building. They are going to die because they are trapped in the World Trade Center and are leaving a very happy life with their loving families.

What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

Three blind mice go into a pub, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative.

I used to have an ugly,black and disabled man as a friend. However, he had a very nasty personality so we are no longer friends.

A man walks into a store. He purchases what he was intending to, walks out, and gets on with his day.

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally. Why did Sally fall of the swings? She had no arms. Why didn't Jimmy help her up? Jimmy is a fish. There's a guy with no arms and no legs who loves to swim. What's his name? Bob. Ya know Bob's twin brother is in the same condition. He loves to play in the leaves. And what's his name? Russell. Why couldn't Sally swing on the swing? She had no arms. What did the girls mom tell her to do before she went to bed? Go to bed. How do you wake up Will Ferrell? You set his alarm clock to a reasonable hour. What did the fat man who had his car stolen tell the police? Someone stole my car.

Why did the man die after getting his picture taken The camera was a gun

Hai Patrick Hai Patrick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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