How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

I have a little dog. She likes being tossed high into the air. I need a new little dog as the last one was caught by a gust carrying here over the sound-dividing highway wall and dropped into traffic.

whats big and can vibrate after you turn it on? A washing machine.

Fun Fact: If you lay out all of the veins in your body out, You will die

What's worse than a baby on a pitchfork? Two babies on a pitchfork.

Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

Why did the black man jump out of the plane? He was going on a parachute dive with his friend.

Why was i sad when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

Why did the black man eat lucky charms? Because it was breakfast time and he was hungry.

what can't see and has four eyes? a blind kid born with four eyes

Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

You- I came up with a new word! Friend- What is it? You- Plagiarism.

What do the NRA and PETA have in common? Both are prominent interest groups from whom political candidates try to obtain votes.

Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

Whats worse then a worm in your apple This joke

why did the chicken cross the road? there was a black man walking towards him

Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

America's Got Talent WIN! Britian's Got Talent WIN! Mexico's Got Talent WTF!

What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

What did the boy say after he stubbed his toe? Owww! I wanna have sex!!!

Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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