What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

Why did Jim not go to the park and play football with his Dad today? His dad got hit by a bus and lost his legs

Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

2 doctors are talking to each other: -Dead? -Dead.

A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

Haikus are simple but sometimes they don't make sense refrigerator.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...