A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

Bang Bang Get the hell out of the house, it's on fire.

What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

When you say that Chuck Norris has counted to infinity twice. I say that you cant count to infinity because it isnt a quantifyable number

I viewed the terms of service and did not agree to them.

Q: What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee and a zebra. A: A crossover between a chimpanzee and a zebra, mixed together.

What do you call a black man? Rob

What do you call two Muslims flying an airplane? Pilots

What is the worst joke ever? This one.

I'm called the! no i wish am I left

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Because she had no arms!

I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

Why can't you teach drivers ed and sex ed at the same time in Iraq? The camel would get tired.

Why did the chicken cross the road? An obsession with what motivates a chicken.

Even dyslexic people attend church and pray to Dog.

Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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