Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

Stop reading these anti-jokes and go study for your externals!

why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

What happens when a truck full of mexicans and a truck full of aisians collide? They all die.

how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

sky silverstein

Your big dick.

people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

What did the monkey say to the Pope and the Queen? Good evening, Your Holiness. Good evening, Your Majesty,

i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...