Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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What did the man with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike

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whats red and hard to eat a brick.

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What's the difference between dead babies and the holocaust? A lot.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because pterodactyls along with all other dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years.

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What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

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Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

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why did they plain crash? cause of gravity stupid

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why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

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why did the cow say baaaaa ? it was a stupid cow

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Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

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Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on.

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what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

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What Happens if a Muslim boy gives you a bomb? You give it to someone else as your playing tnt tag and the bombs a toy

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

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Whose your daddy? Not me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops