- Anti Joke

I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

When making an Anti-Joke, you click the button that says: 'I have read and agree to the terms of service' What are you called? A Liar.

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

Cripples are lame.

How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

How do you make a cripple cry Cut of his legs, THEN telll him a joke

Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one