Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

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Whats a black and white and red all over? i dont know...who spends their time researching this kind of stuff

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

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Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

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my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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Whats Green and Smells Like Grass? Grass

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What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

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Two muffins are in an oven one muffin says to the other muffin "It's hot in here" the other muffin says "Holy crap a talking muffin".

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

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A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

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Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

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A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

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My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

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A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

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Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

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Why did the little girl only walk half way across the street She fell into a man hole and died

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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