I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

why was the boy sad He was just abused by his parents and had aids

What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

How do you stop a friendly bear from bouncing up and down on your front lawn? Shoot it in the neck.

What did Joe do after the party? He went home.

(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

What do your friends have in common with a tree? They both fall down when you hit them multiple time with an axe

why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

What's worse than getting your dog neutered? You being the dog.

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

Jesus Christ

Mary had a little lamb And a side of fries.

Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

When life gives you lemons, refrigerate them so they don't go bad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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