why did the boy eat his lunch money? it was his lunch!

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Why did the turtle fall out of the car? It forgot to buckle up

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Why was Jacob not allowed to play sports? He fell down in the middle off the street and got ran over 50 times and could never do anything again.

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a white van was driving really slow and he stopped in front 3 children. "do you want some candy" the old man said. the kids took the candy and the old man drove away happily, knowing he made someones day.

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Why did the cow cross the road? He probably saw a delicious looking patch of grass on the otherside.

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Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

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Man #1:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: I don't know Man #1: Because he died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Because he died? Man #1: Yep. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Really? Come on, I've already answered your stupid question. Man #1: JUST ANSWER! Man #2: Fine, because he died. Man #1: No, peer pressure. Duh. Man #2 promplty punches Man #1 in the face and continues about his buisness.

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

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Ashton Kutcher meets a fine cougar at a bar and the cougar fatally wounded his throat.

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

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Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

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When did Dom become so brave? When he made friends

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A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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NO ONE LIKES RANGAS

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YOU

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What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

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Q: Why didn't Little Jhonny go to school today? A: There was no school today.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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