What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

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Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

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Guess what? What. This joke isn't funny

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Two peanuts walked into a bar one was as'salted'

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Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

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what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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What's clear on the outside and grey on the inside? An elephant in a plastic bag.

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You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just beat it for being black.

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I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

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here is a good joke... your moms a bitch END OF STORY!

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So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his wife in the hospital. She has terminal cancer.

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

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You look like Susan Boyle f**ked Snooki and then got hit by a truck.

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The diamond one below is hilarious.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks heavily and dies of alcohol poisoning.

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whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

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guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

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youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops