What's long and black The unemployment line

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Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

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how do you make holy water? you burn the hell out of it

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Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

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Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

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Why did Suzie get raped? because she was out past her bedtime. and the morale to this story is that its funny to be raped.

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What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

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A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

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Joe: Will you remember me tomorrow? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next week? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next month? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next year? Mack: Yes Joe: Knock knock Mack: Who's there? Joe: See you forgot me already! Mack: No I didn't Joe, I thought you were going to tell me a knock knock joke. :/

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so a man walks into a bar..... and says ouch.

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A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

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Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

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pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

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who holds the world record for longest amount of time on fire? Jim Rome

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whats small and blue? a suffocated baby

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Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

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What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

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why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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