What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

A little boy had a candle by his bedside. It fell over. The candle was fake, and it didn't burn down his house. When he woke up, he picked up the candle, put it back on his nightstand and had a wonderful day.

Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a psychopath

What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

When life gives you limes, say hey! wait a second ,aren't these meant to be lemons? then kill yourself

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

You know whats annoying? Steve

Yo mama is so stupid... She didn't graduate high school.

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

What did the moose say to the photographer? Moose say cheese.

three black teenagers went to the cinema to watch twilight

Those who believe that Sarah Palin is dumb are living in some fantasyland. She could damn well speak as much as anyone else!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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