Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

Whats the difference between a black man and a picnic table? Alot of things

Why couldn't the T-Rex give anyone a high five? Cuz he's dead.

what happened to the slut last time she opened her legs. a bee flew in and stung her. turned out she was deathly allergic. she died a painful death.

Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

A grandma starts pinching her grandsons cheeks and saying who's a little cutie pie the baby begins to bleed cause his grandmas nails are peircing his skin

What did the little kid say to the stranger? Nothing. He was taught not to talk to strangers.

what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know... I thought no one knew the answer to that question...

life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

What's worst then a parking ticket? The plague

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi walk into a butcher's shop. The priest and the minister each by a pound of pork while the rabbi doesn't because one of the 613 Commandments is that a Jew shall not eat any animal with hooves.

Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

Theres an irishman , scottish man and a welsh man on a plane they where going to france

Why does the cow have spots? Because it was born that way

Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it tastes good.

Grease is the word that you heard it's got groove it's got meaning

A Chinese man... pulling another Chinese man in one of those carts behind him.

Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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