Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesnt rhyme And your entire family died trying to fly to your house for Christmas. They crashed into a orpanage for death children. There were no survivors.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your limbs scliced off with a chainsaw and being put in a cage to get mauled by a Mutant Man-eating horse.

Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

I got on a bus, and immediately found that sitting on a bus is boring. I will never climb on top of a bus again.

So let's pretend two men that had been friends for a very long time, one man asks the other man how he is, so the man tells the other man how he is doing. Then that man asks the other man how he is doing. The two men were engaged in a very interesting conversation. What did the men do next? Nothing. We're pretending, remember?

There was a scientist that was doing a social experiment with mothers and their children. The name of first kid was named candy because it was her mothers favourite thing. The second kid name was rose because it was her mothers Favourite thing. The last mother knew what was happening and said to her son "Come on Dick".

Why did the boy not eat his ice cream? He was addicted to self afflicting. The blood from one of his newer slashes oozed out on the cone which being wafer slowly got soggy. At this point the ice cream slid out of the cone as it was soggy and as he went to eat it, he found an abssence of ice cream. After this unprecedented occurance he gave up with his self harming, so all was good.

Why did the duck walk on the moon? Because it was his lifelong goal

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips.

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Then the man pays for the beer and drinks the beer.

whats the difference between a black guy and pizza? a pizza can feed a family.

What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

What is black and white and red all over? I don't know. I was hoping you did.

What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

knock knock. who's there? just open. just open who? you're really dumb aren't you

What's brown and sticky? Most forms of excrement.

:)Knock Knock :(Whose's there? :)None ya :(None ya who? :)None ya dam business.

How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

What did Mel Gibson say to the African-American? I'm sorry

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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