Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

What has 2 legs, a heart and a conscience? YER MA

that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

A witch walks into a bar and orders a drink. She gets her drink and proceeds to have a great time.

what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

Why isn't Juley at school today? Oh Her father chopped off her arms and legs, gagged her, ripped out both eyes and threw her in a lake tied to cinderblocks!

What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

Why do black people have white palms? Genetics.

Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

How do you get your dog to stop barking? You snap its neck.

Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

Is it a bird, Is it a plane, I don't know what it is but it's heading straight for the World Trade Centre

How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

What happened to the asian when he took viagra? He got an erection.

A baby seal walks into a club.

How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

ROTFL = Reaching out to fellow lossers

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

What did the follower of Neronism say to the follower of Christianity? Nothing, Neronism doesn't exist. -KyuremCult

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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