How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

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How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

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Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

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A man walks into a bar. He suffers a fatal concussion and the playground is shut down by local police until proper padding is installed.

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Obama

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Why are anti-jokes funny? They are not because they have no punchline and if you wern't a complete dumbass you would have the ability to read the description on the right off the page.

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What did Santa say when he fell down? Ouch

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a man was hired for a job. he made a lot of money and was able to support his family.

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Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

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When life gives you a hamburger, you know you're at Mr. Life's Hamburger Stand on 8th Avenue.

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Q: What do you call a black man's car being egged? A: A Hate Crime

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Why did the man cross the street? Because he had to go work.

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roses are red violents are blue your dad is gay soon it all be you !

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What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

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Wayne Rooney's face and intelligence.

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Once upon a time, Ducks THE END

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She won't have a pulse.

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What do apples and black men both have in common? They are both people except for the apple

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

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Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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