Why was everyone afraid of Nick Morton? Because he had AIDS

Q: What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

Q. Why was the boy depressed? A. Because he lives in a world where apparently all girls are right.

Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

Dyslexia ruels!

If chuck Norris is so awesome how come he's not at my house slamming my face into the keybodhdtegdudgegdtdjaowpqhwvsmx vxbdnsksksh

Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

a boy walks into a hospital ward, and procedes to break down into tears because his family died

What did the blonde say when she was asked what color her hair was ? Blonde.

Women outside of the kitchen.

So there is this moose and he goes to a grocery store and asks, "where are the potatoes?" the employee says "aisle 5" and when the moose checks in aisle five, there are no potatoes.

Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

knock knock who's there jehovas witness... ...I allow them into my house for a cup of tea and a chat as I respect their religion

What did the millionaire say to the hobo? Hi there.

There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

Yo mama so fat......Hiroshima.

Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

Why did the man eat his wife? He was a cannibal

Put my shoes on the wrong feet. Don't matter, i'm gunna die anyway.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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