Did you see my sandwitch? No. I am your sandwitch, and therefore no one thought to put me up to a mirror. Would you like me to? No. I have no eyes. And why are you talking to a sandwitch??? ...

*Science Teacher goes into his class* Teacher:MR MCAAAAAAAN! What's the answer?! MrMccann: I dunno sir. Teacher: WHAT DO YA MEAN YA DUNNO?! HAVE I EVER ASKED YOU A QUESTION YOU DON'T KNOW THE ANSWER TO?! MrMcann: No Teacher:Then answer this. JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN DO YOU KNOW THE ANSWER?!

What's similar between the Alabama Crimson Tide and a maggot? They've both been feeding off of a dead Bear for 30 years...

What did the white man say to the black man? Nice Pants

What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

Colin is gay but toasters are not

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Dinosaurs are extinct.

What do u call a joke with no punchline? An anti-joke

one stop shop

what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

ROMEO ROMEO WHEREFORE ART THOU ROMEO

What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

EVERYONE TEXT 513-550-3742 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names eric

How did the boy fall off his bike? A fridge was thrown off him

so...um, yeah

what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

This is a bad anti-joke. Just kidding, it's a good one.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

Q.A duck walks into a bar and asks for grapes.What is the duck asking for? A. Nothing... Ducks can't talk

What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

why did the man reverse time? because his girlfriend died,also this man was super

Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

What's worse than getting pulled over by the police? getting pulled over and getting a bloody tampon stuck to your forehead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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