What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? ouch.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

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Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall?? A: It depends on how hard you throw them!!

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What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

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A guy walks into a bar- he walks out of the bar because the beer was expensive and he didn't feel like getting drunk.

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What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? Can I have fries with that?

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Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

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Cole likes to trim jaycie's butt pubes

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roses are red violets are microwaves i have amnesia what ma name iiizzz 'SHAWTAY

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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I have an idea! You leave.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra

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69

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race-car = rac-ecar

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What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

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Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She got her arms cut off. Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

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What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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