Did you know that many scientists will find out what happens after death within your lifetime? But not their lifetime...

Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding herpes in your apple.

What do you do when you come across a dead baby? Add it to your collection.

jibby jobby

Když si to Nikolas ,dejme tomu že Bihary, you know nuseng.. hahahahaha

I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

two men are in a bathroom (note they are not in the same stall) the guy on the left says how are you and the guy on the right says hold on im pooping.

Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the p is silent!

When does the Narwhal bacon? The Narwhal bacons at mid-night.

One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

why did the black guy cross the street? to get to the package store.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Living in Africa.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

Knock Knock! Who's there? Hitler.

Have you seen Hellen Kellers mon?... Neither has she

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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