What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have down syndrome, my favorite color is potato

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

Where did jimmy go when the bomb exploded.... (Everywhere )

Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and blind.

what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Phil.

When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

What did the woman say to the black man in bed Good morning honey

What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

Roses are OK, Violets do the trick, C'mon and let me whip out my Dick.

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

Have u ever noticed why a Police car siren isnt as loud as an ambulance siren? Do u know why that is? Because i dont, and i would like to know because my over active and curious brain is pounding through my skull and throbbing with question and wont stop until i know the answer!

why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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