Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

what is 3+3= 8

So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

A man walks into a meat shop. Man: I bet you $20 you can't reach the meat on the top shelf. Butcher: The steaks are too high

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

whats black and strange a paki

Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

Hey how was your audition?" "yeah really good, I got in...

Q: Why did Katie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, Knock Who's There? Not Katie.

Two hippies walk into a bar. They are both asked to leave because they are in violation of the 'no shoes, no service' policy.

What did the monkey say to the Pope and the Queen? Good evening, Your Holiness. Good evening, Your Majesty,

How do you make a little boy cry? Cut off his legs.

How many mentally challenged beings does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well one couldn't do it so adding more to the equation will only make it worse sir.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?' The horse say " i have testicular cancer."

Your mom is so nerdy that she probably went to college, got her degree, then found a very successful job in a field that she finds interesting.

What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

You're mama's so stupid, she decided to go back to school and finish her degree in Russian Literature to improve her self-esteem and maybe -- just maybe -- save her marriage, which had been on the rocks, mostly due to her intolerable self-loathing.

Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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