A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

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Why did the kid need glasses? A monkey threw a fridge at him.

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A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

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What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

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How do u kill a black man You don't or else u will get intouble for murder but u can if u want there r many ways

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What's black and blue and hates sex? A rape victim.

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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A bloke walked in to a bakers shop and asked for a loaf of bread. Certainly sir, said the assistant, white or brown?...it doesn't matter, answered the man, I've left my bike outside

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If you give a mouse a cookie, he will probably eat it then have a heart attack due to the high level of sugar in the cookie

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I have magical powers. Try your best to not to follow these instructions: Ready? Go. You are now blinking your eyes. (strike 1) You are now breathing voluntary. (strike 2) You suddenly have an itch somewhere on your body. (strike 3) You lost. Thanks for playing my little game. Hope you enjoy thinking of a flying pink elephant with wings.

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how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

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knock knock who's there bob bob who bob marley who else

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What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

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What do you do when you find a black guy bleeding on your porch? You should call an ambulance! This man is hurt!

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why is andreas making a pizza? since he dosent get laid he likes the feeling of the sauce stinging on his dick

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar. Everyone runs out, screaming, "AH, a dead guy is walking!"

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Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

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What did the parents say to their kid? You're adopted and we don't love you.

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Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

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what do you call a baby with a stamp on his nose.? Kentucky won the national championship this year

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Its crackers to slip a rozer and dropsey in snide.

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Dubstep = a computer with a noisy virus.

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What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

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Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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