Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was content where he was.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers. Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets the job done. Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what did one apple say to another apple nothing apples cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's the difference between an alligator and an argyle sweater? There are far too many conceivable differences between the two objects to be able to give an actual definite variance between them.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

daughter and boyfriend havin sex baby baby baby ohhh!! mum walks in; what you doin signin to justin bieber,oh ok just make sure you dont sing to his song its crap!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

When Chuck Norris moved into a new house he decide to renovate because he didn't like the staircase.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

a blond, a brunette, and a redhead are stuck on top of a mountain. they freeze to death and the rescue team discovers their frozen bodies two days later.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What happened to the boy who crossed the road without looking both ways? He was abducted by aliens.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call a car with no wheels? Trash

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 1, idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why am I writing this? Cuz I am eating babies alive right now!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Where did the girl go after the explosion? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

thumb_up thumb_down -22

color blind person solves a rubix cube just kidding thier color blind

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops