why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

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A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

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What's white and has a crusty nose? Luke Lange

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where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

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If Donald Trump was in Game Of Thrones, he'd probably be a part of The Wall.

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Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

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How many Bedouins do you need to change a light bulb? 2, one is changing the bulb and the second is powering the generator.

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Ron Sparks.

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youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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Your mom is so fat because she eats too much and is most likely incapable of controlling when to stop.

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If a tree falls in the forest, but nothing is there to hear it, does it still make noise ? Yes, because whether the action of the three falling produces sound waves or not is not dependent on whether something is there to receive these waves.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his kids.

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how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

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Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

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what's red and has seven feet? the red man who had seven feet as a result of a serious genetic mutation

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what did one computer say to the other .........

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Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

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Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

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What's big, hairy and smells like sweat? The big show after a hard days work in the ring.

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How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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