y do black people always have nightmares because we killed the one who had a dream

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What do u call a man who is smart. A lawyer/ genius/ smart man

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The Police The Police who? We're sorry Ma'am your son has died in a car accident... --------- Knock Knock! Who's there? Not your son

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don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says, I'm sorry but you have about four to six months to live. The man goes home and checks his million dollar life insurance policy.It expires in three months.

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Cyrus: Can you dig it?! Phil: I can feel it calling in the air tonite……..oh lord

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Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

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Bob goes to the store and buys some food.

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How does a black man have sex? He inserts his penis into his partners vagina, then slides it out, then inserts it back in, and repeats this motion untill he has reached his climax and ejaculates!

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children are much like potatoes. when you eat them, they die.

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Excuse me, I have a shitload of stuff to do, so you are Eliza huh? I thought that was just one person conveying something to someone. Anyway, what is your name? My name is actually Nero, but you do not strike me as an Eliza, first name is more than enough. You know, if you dare, Ill be back shortly, I was gonna shower but then again, I haven't moved at all today, so yeah. Saved you? I have never saved anyone well, excuse me then, see you around, worry less about people bothering with us chatting, hell they might risk learning something (not a chance, people here are fucking jackasses, with one exception, and I do not mean me this time).

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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42

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Knock knock Who the fuck says knock knock?

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A blonde girl walks into a car.

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The 13 year old tied up in my basement.

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What do you call someone who doesn't have a soul? A ginger

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Glasses

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Whats worse than getting in an arrow in the side of your neck Finding out there is a gas bill tied to it

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What do you call a muslim flying an airplane? A pilot.

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Why did the man eat a human heart? Because he was part of a dangerous, religious cult.

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Q: Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: Because he was hit by a bus, and then was raped violently. He is currently undergoing psychotherapy.

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What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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