A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She didnt have any arms

Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

What did the dinosaur say to the caveman? Nothing. Dinosaurs were wiped off the earth due to a tragic, world wide extinction about 65 million years ago while small mammals which would eventually evolve into humans survived.

Whats the difference between a black man and a mexican? The skin pigmentation and most likely the size of their penis

What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

knock knock come in

how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

What screams when you poke it? A rape alarm.

So my teacher came upto me, and says "At the end of this ruler is a idiot" so I said "Which end?" I got detention.

Q: What's worse than finding out you have genital herpes? A: Finding out your grandmother gave them to you

why did the girl fall off the swing? her dad threw a refrigerator jlr

Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Young Billy was arrested today for saying he was going to be a terrorist for Halloween.

Why can't black people get sunburned? Natural selection allowed ancient Africans to develop a darker skin shade that would counter strong UV rays.

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

What's worse than the holocaust? Two holocausts.

1+2 = 6

I love pissing people off :P

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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