knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

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What did Batman say to Robin before going into the Batmobile? Get in the car.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

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What's Funny and has two Wheels A kids falling off his bike

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what happened to the little girl when she crossed the line she was shot. shes mexican

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Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water, Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after. They both died of blood loss.

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The way I see it, you are pretty lucky I am a tough guy, the kind you like. Anyway you where really wondering if I ever refer myself as a boy? Sigh, I mean I AM A BOY! WHAT? WHAT? Savage jokes? What jokes?

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guess what? bannanas

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Why was the black man tangled in chains at the bottom of the ocean? Because he was a highly skilled diver and environmentalist who tragically entangled himself and consequently died slowly and painfully of suffocation while trying to save a whale from eating waste metal.

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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someone jumped off a bridge he died

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs at night? An experimental animal mutilated then exposed to radiation.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road A. Because he needed to get to the other side

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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Why didnt the guy eat cereal? Cause he didnt have any

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What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

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A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

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Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops