Why did they chicken cross the road? It didn't. A van ran it over when it was halfway across.

What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returns and says, "My friend does not have a pulse, so I stand by my prior assumption that he is dead."

An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a prostitute.

What happened to the teenager who was raped and murdered? Who knows? They never found the body.

Your mother is so ugly that I removed her from my friends list on Facebook.

Happy Birthday! Your mom is dead!

jumping jelly beans theirs a snake in my booties,, ooooooo har har ya ya youve got that one thing baby peace love and applesauce baby!!!!1

My name is Nero, Angelo Nero, its Italian (or rather Roman) For Black Angel, and yes it is my real name, you will believe me once you see my passport, driving license, mastercard whatever, I am 32 years old and I wont tell you my last name because at this rate... You could probably just google me up and find it yourself. Seriously, I am latino you know that, romantic is in my veins, but hey, you never told me you liked that so if we agreed to sex, that was what I was going with... I did tell you that sex is kinda meh for me without the romance factor. The thing about your name being Tifa, is that you look A LOT like the video game character, I mean come on! You even got red eyes! (okay hers may be a brownish red but come on!) You should post a picture of yourself online and see how many guys find you really sexy... Then again, dont, I want you for myself. Sorry this is taking some time, I dont get any of these solvemedia crapcraps

What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

Want to burn 3000 calories in under 5 MINUTES? Take a store bought pizza and put it in the over for as long as you want. Just watch the calories burn away in a puff of smoke!

I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

"Do you have Prince Albert in a can?" "No." "Good. Tobacco causes cancer."

there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

Boy: Will you go out with me? Girl: No. Boy: Why? Girl: Because I don't want to.

Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

why did the chicken cross the road? he saw a rather desperate looking homeless person coming towards him, and, realizing he had no change, figured it was the best way to avoid an awkward situation.

ask me if i am a tree. no.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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