What did one lion say to the other lion? Nothing. There was no other lion. This particular lion had horrible social anxiety so he spent most of his time alone, eating buffalo poop and playing World of Warcraft thus further alienating himself from the other lions. He was a very lonely lion.

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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

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why did the man stop his bike he was having a heart attack

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What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike.

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Why are Pirates called Pirates? Because the word originates from the term Pirata which means 'sea attacker' in Latin.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? - Nothing This homeless man got a gift for his Birthday. What happened to the gift? - It got stolen the following day What did this homeless man get for New Year? - Still nothing Get real.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Larry The Cableguy....thats it.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

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Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

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What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

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Why was everyone afraid of Nick Morton? Because he had AIDS

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so a boy walks into a bar he was underage and escorted out.

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How did the two friends cross the busy road? They couldn't, because that would be considered jay-walking

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hi penis ham telephone

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What's the difference between ?2 and and 74^3? ?-405242.585786

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What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

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Roses are red Violets are red I have Ebola

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

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Its a bird!! Its a plane!! No, its a bird.

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You get the census of income per citizen and see who is at the top.

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Have you seen Helen Keller's house? Well, It's an old style ranch home in a respectable neighborhood.

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Why didn't little Timmy get anything for Christmas? He was an orphan living on the streets.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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