Why did the black guy smell fried chicken? He had a brain tumour

What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

Who are you if you can rub 2 ice cubes to make fire? Chuck Norris

Why was the Irish Cop happy to see the Mexican family killed in a accident? Because the Lopez family were a family known for generosity and selflessness. It came as no surprise to anyone who knew Steven Lopez and his beloved family that they were all organ donors and not only that but Shelly Lopez, Steven's oldest daughter had blood type O negative (the universal donor). Officer McO'Brianiganly's wife is dying in the hospital in need of a kidney transplant, doctors have given her just weeks to live. Now, thanks to unfortunate events for la familia Lopez., Officer McO'Brianiganly and his wife can live a long happy life together, just as they always imagined.

Why did the teenager drink a beer? Because it was actually full of sizzurp

#Last Christmas I gave you my heart #And as far as I know #The transplant was a complete sucess #And you have recovered from your operation #And are now well again #This year to save me from tears #I'll donate my kidneys

What is worse than torture? Not much.

Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

what is awesome but stupid at the same time? school i lied about the awesome part :p

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Reading re-posts of classic anti jokes posted by lonely teenagers.

whats a parkour kid? someone who jumps off things and is a pre-teen with adhd

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? What's the WNBA?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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