A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

What do the Chinese call "Ping Pong"? Ping Pong

why did the Mexican eat a octopus because he was hungry would die if he didn't

anti-joke.ru - russian style

This is a bad anti-joke. Just kidding, it's a good one.

Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

A man drives down the road in a van that says "Candy" He was doing his job in a professional manner

Why did David Hasselhoff talk to his car? Because it was KIT from knight Rider and had voice recognition software and so could understand him

Why doesnt the chicken wear any pants? His pecker is on his head

In an all out brawl between the casts of Gilligan's Island, Hogan's Heroes and the Brady Bunch, who would be the winner? The Viewer

What did the man say when he put his genitals in a blender? Argggghhh!

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

A mother with a bum hip and her son go to walk up a set of stairs in the mall. The floor was slippery because the janitor just mopped the floor. They decide to take the elevator instead.

Why did the chicken cross the road. To get to the other side. Original anti joke.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting c- Moo

the elephant asks the man, " how do u breathe out of that thing?" the man proceeds to explain to the elephant how he breathes out of his nose.

Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

What is the name of the car? What

When life gives you a pack of Kools, make Kool-Aid.

What happened to the baby in the microwave. I don't know I was too busy masturbating off to it in my clown suit

What did the cat say when someone pointed out that cats can't talk? Meow.

what did Tim do when he got married? He kissed the bride Mecheoo LOVES ASS

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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