what do you say to a black guy on steroids? B!tch please

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A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

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what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

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A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and gives a heavy sigh. The bartender asks, "What's wrong?" The guy says, "Nothing."

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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Why was the boy laughing? Because

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Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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alert("Hello");

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Why did the plane crash The pilot, being an uneducated pilot, crashed the plane as he didn't have proper training, and the whole of the passengers died.

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

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A young baby died.

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Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

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Why did 3 kids mom's die last year? Because they were depressed and committed suicide.

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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Today, my house burned to the ground. FML.

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We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw bricks at its face.

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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What's the new green? Green

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-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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