Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

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why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

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How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's DEAD!

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What's wet and pink and fun to watch in someone's face? A big bubble gum bubble exploding into someone's face.

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"Where are my shoes?" asked the man. "On your feet," I replied. "You are a paraplegic and have no feeling from the waist down."

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

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What's the difference between a black person and a park bench? Benches are inanimate objects while people are indeed carbon-based life forms.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Unfortunate

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

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what is orange? an orange

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like lead, I did a poo.

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What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a nintendo wii.

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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What's brown and red but looks purple? Mixed paint!

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Why did the cat die? To get to the other side

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Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

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Whats worse them finding a worm in your apple??? finding out your adopted

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How come the dog didn't want to go into the sun? -Because it didn't want to turn into a hotdog.

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whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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