A horse walks into a bar the bartender says "Why the long face?" and the horse said "My wife died of terminal cancer"

Why didnt the boy go to school? His mum threw a fridge at him!

Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

How do you kill a vampire? You can't because vampires aren't real.

Q: What's the difference between a bird and a fly? A: A bird can fly, but a fly can't bird.

What's black and white and red all over? A blood-soaked zebra

Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

hes climbing in your window, hes snatching your people up. Hes a fireman.

A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

What do you get if you throw a banana at the wall? Nothing.

Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

What's worser than dieing? Living-being tortured while at it too

what would you get if you combined a sixth grader with a machine gun? A homophobe

Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

Why are black people so dark? They originated from Africa

What say the mirror if i look in it,? He died

Twelve muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin said "Where are we?" Another muffin said "Yikes! A talking muffin!"

Me: What postion in baseball does a cat play? You: I don't know? What? Me: I don't know i haven't eaten that part yet.

Why did the blonde get a tattoo of her adress on her arm? She never wanted to forget her great childhood at her family home, and she hoped that she would come back some day.

Why Did the man Commit suicide? His body used cellular respiration to make ATP (A form of energy) and his body used it to send electrical signals to his index finger to pull the trigger on his .357 Magnum, thus putting a bullet through the soft tissue in his brain causing his body to shut down Imediately!

what did one dog say to his sex partner? woof woof

Why couldn't the boy write his name because he had no arms.

Your mom is so hairy... it doesn't even seem like she underwent chemotherapy for her breast cancer a few months ago.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...