Customer: Waiter, waiter, there is a fly in my soup! Waiter: Sorry madam.

what has balls and is long and suckible? Spaghetti

What did the lion say on a hot day in Africa? Nothing, lions can't talk.

Why was the leaf green? Chlorophyll

yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

A gay man watches football.

Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

What do you call two black men flying an airplane? Pilots.

A black man walks into a white man on the street. The white man viciously beats the black man.

Son: Mommy can I have some cookies? Mom: Sure, they're on the top shelf! Son: But I don't have any arms! Mom: No arms, no cookies!

Why did rachels computer break ? Because she was using it in the road and got hit by a bus

The WNBA

Me: Mike Mike: Yeah Me: The more you breath the more pissed off im getting.

what happened to the asian who failed his math quiz... his parents killed him

A man said hello to a woman. He was italian...

Twinkle twinke little star How I wonder what you are? Star: (Noun) A fixed luminous point in the night sky that is a large, remote incandescent body like the sun.

What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

If life gives you lemons, you are probably suffering from hallucinations.

What's worse than finding an apple in your worm? Lebron traveled

Your momma is so fat, when she bent down to get a peice of wood, she fell down the steps.

What does china and an 80 year old body builder have in common? They're both asian. I forgot to mention that the body builder is japanese.

get it right up there, says jacob while with danni

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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