What do you call a white duck? A quacker

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what happens when Pinocchio says "My nose is growing"?

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Why did Hitler kill himself? He saw his gas bill.

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What do a squirrel and a grape have in common? They are both purple except for the squirrel.

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i like my coffee like i like my women. without a penis.

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Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

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A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

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Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

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Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

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Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

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What do you call a black man riding a bicycle? A good citizen who cares about the environment.

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If Alex Maitland reads this he is gay

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Okay, but lets write a contract, if you regret your decision at anytime, you get it all back, minus what I have spent of course, both I and my wife have always wanted to live in a house by the sea, hopefully you nearby. You know, I have never been truly happy because I thought I could change this world, now I know that I tried and failed, maybe I can change myself instead, they say that true change comes from within.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven beat and raped Six when he was child multiple times, and Seven threatened to kill Six if he told anyone.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

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TOFFEES HEAD LYING IN THE GRASS

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Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo. Get in the van.

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Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

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Q - What is worse than a nerdy joke on anti-jokes with a lot of big words in it? A - Although I get scared when i see big words, the page long jokes are probably worse

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Justin Beiber

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican and an African? A baby.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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