How do you fit 76 babies in a bath tub... With a blender. How do you get them back out? With tortilla chips.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Very carefully.

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Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

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What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

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Why was Stephanie sad? She dropped a washing machine on her toe

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If you'd turn to page 43 you will find the homework. Have a good weekend!

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Yes 59 10 away from my faverite number....... 49

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Will Smiths rapping attempt was suprisingly not harmful to his career as he later played in blockbusters such as Independence Day, Men in Black, The Pursuit of Happiness ect..

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Why did the man shoot himself? Because he already shot his wife.

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Q. What do you call a person with no arms, legs, torso, or head? A. A mutilated corpse.

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Knock knock *open*

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You know what helps with back pain? If you lick my butt hole.

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How does Justin Bieber remove a condom? he farts

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Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

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An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

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Joke

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Women are like fish. It's hard to tell when they are crying underwater.

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What is better than tissues? Correct!

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Whats yello and cant swim A bus full of dead children in a lake

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What is the worst place to be in race if you're racing with me Behind me

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if i get 1,000 likes ill kill your hole family

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Roses are red Violets are victorious 2 in a chamber Mr pistorius

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Yo mama is so old, the bone structure of her spine has decayed significantly since she stopped growing and has therefore shrunken in height considerably. Her face and hands have accumulated abundant visual wear; wrinkles, and has arthritis as well.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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