What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dying unloved.

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How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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Where did the little boy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Ask me if I'm a dinosaur. Are you dinosaur? No.

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Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

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Haikus are easy Im happy when I write them Thats pretty much it

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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Why was 2 afraid of 81? Because seven eight nine.

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What did the Blind man say to the deaf man? Nothing, he doesn't know sign language

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a man paints himself yello shrinks himself and walks into a baber shop then he relizes that the sizers are yello so he gets cut up into shreds and dies. THE END!

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Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

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Roses are red Violets are red Jimmy is red Sally is red Susie is red Jimmy is red Billy is red Carl is red Jose is red Jerry is red Ferdinand is red Everyone is red Because they all just got shot In the head And now they're dead

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What do you call a blue horse with two legs and five eyes? A blue horse with two legs and five eyes.

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What do you call a mormon in a red jumpsuit covered in black spots? Proper terminology for this scenario has not been yet made

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Your mom's so fat, she's is bigger than the average person.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A bug in your nut.

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I have a dirty joke. Poop.

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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Swag.

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How many licks did it take for the owl to get to the center of the tootsie roll tootsie pop? A: Since when did owls have tounges?

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How did Hitler make the world a better place? He died.

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Why did Hunter cross the road? No one cares, unless he gets hit.

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Why did the old lady walk across the road? She was on her way to the convenience store on the other side.

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If a tree falls on a woman, and no one is around to hear it, what is a tree doing in the kitchen?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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