What do you call a guy with no legs and no arms? Mat.

A boy is diagnosed with terminal cancer. His family prays for him and he still dies.

The worst part of waking up, Is no Folgers in your cup.

Waiter, there is a hydrogen conducting carbon nanotube in my soup. That is part of the special, sir.

A zebra and a giraffe are out in a safari and they see some humans. And then the cow, was drinking, the man was milking the drink, when the giraffe was going to buy some milk. She said, the was yeah okay.

What do you call a place full of large volumes of random, unwanted knowledge? The usersub on this site.

What did God tell Moses to deliver to the Hebrews? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

a black, mexican, jewish, and white man fall off a cliff, who landed first ? all at the same time, they all died and there familys sued the clifff and commited sucicede

What's old and has wet pants? My grandma with a bladder problem

Why did the chicken cross the road? He saw a bottle of Faygo on the other side.

You wanna see something really scary?

if there is a circle of fat people and you throw a cookie in the middle of the circle. It will be the best game of hungry hungry hippos you will ever see.

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

I'm funnY!!! Haha pënis

Q. How do you make your neighbor mad? A. Run his kids over.

Roses are red, violets are blue, if i gave a rats ass, I'd worry about you.

Q. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman? A. Cause you have to hollow out it's head! A blonde walked into a doctor's office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked her, "What happened to your ear?" The blonde replied, "I was ironing and the phone rang, so instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear. Still not satisfied, the doctor asked, "Well, what happened to the other ear?" "The sucker called again!"

"Lets begin, tell me about yourself," "ok, well first I'm a open book and..." "ok next" "why?" "I fucking hate books!"

eh dylan quieres que te trolle de nuevo

Riddle me this, riddle me that. I'll eat your f^cking cat.

Why don't traffic lights go swimming? Because they aren't sentient or animate, and therefore can't decide to undertake such an activity. Even if they were sentient, they wouldn't enjoy swimming as the water would damage their electrical works.

What's for dinner tonight? Your mom's vagina.

Yo momma so fat that when she sat on the bible jesus poped out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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