What's green and fuzy and could kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

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a man ran into a bar screaming. he now has a severe coma

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yo mama so old that back in her school she didnt have history class

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what do you call a man who go his head cut off in a car accident? dead.

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Roeses are purple violets are green WTF u just stabbed me.

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gay porn...

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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What did the Jew say to the Catholic? Nothing. He is a mute you insensitive moron!

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wanna here a joke? you.

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What's round and cheesy? A cheese wheel.

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what is the most efficient way to scratch your balls? hire a leprechaun slave.

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why did the girl cross the road? to get away from you

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There once was a man from Madrass, whose balls were made out of brass. This was incredibly embarrassing for him, and rendered him infertile and impotent, which in turn affected his relationships with women.

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Food and blankets from a nearby shelter.

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how many dead babies can fit in a microwave? 3 1/2

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I know there are, its not the illuminati, its not reptilian shapeshifters, nor Gods politicians nor the human condition. Its society today as it stands, they did not have the right to attack us, but if we had surpassed them, they would have lost all power, they are the relics of the past, and no matter how many of them stand, they do not grow, and what does not grow, stagnates until it finally dies. Lose hope in people most all you want, but not in the few that truly believe in you for all the good reasons in the world, perhaps we are idealists, or maybe we know that with you by our side, what we see as ideals, is something you can make come true.

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Ben Wuz here was the funniest Hahahahaha

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There were three men named manner, poop, and shut up. they all were mad fun of in middle school and ended up hating their parents for giving them such retarded names.

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Why did the jew cross the road Because he was being cornered by 10 nazis that had automatic guns

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how do u kill a blonde: drop something shiny at the bottom of a pool how do u kill 2 blondes: but a mirror at the bottom of a pool how do u kill 3 blondes: ask which 1 of them is the prettiest and then wait 5 minuetes:)

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A blonde, a brunnette, and a red head all jump from the top of a building. They all land at the same time because of Newton's 3rd Law

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800000000000000000?0?00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?0000 I hate you

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Why did the baby stop crying? I shot it with a 9mm pistol and put it in the microwave because it cried while I was watching Sienfeld.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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