roses are red violets are blue im much younger than i look;)

what do you call a man with no arms or legs jetskiiing? I don't know but it seems a highly improbably situation.

How do you get birds to land in your back yard? With a gun.

your face

Shush girl, shut your lips do the Helen Keller and advocate the rights the disabled.

Did you know that all of the seasons are named after coils of metal? Except Winter... And Autum... And Summer...

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings

Chuck Norris is dead......

How can you tell if an elephant has been in your fridge? Broken fridge.

Yo mama's so gay, she's a guy.

what happened to the girl that didn't forward the threatening chain text to ten people? nothing.

Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

Manchester City

What's worse than getting arrested? getting arrested on your birthday.

why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

whats funnier than a black person dieing nothing that is so cruel

Q: Why did the grand mother drop her cane? A: She got pused out a window.

haha Otarts was here

Kid hands Lebron a dollar, asks for change Lebron hands him back 4 quarters.

What did the over confident jack-ass say to the hot girl, You'll do.

Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

What did the broom say to the vacuum cleaner? "Your mom sucks."

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Roses are red.

Life's like a box of chocolates it's shit if you have diabetes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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