If Miley Cyrus has the ability to come in like a wrecking ball, how come she can't twerk?

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M's factory? For throwing away all the W's

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Taxes are like prostitutes. The higher your salary, the more you pay.

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Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

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Why did the boy stay in the closet? Because the door was locked.

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What do you get when you cross a muffin with chocolate chips? A chocolate chip muffin.

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I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

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Why can't Dave drive? Because Dave is an orange.

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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Doctor, Doctor I think your gay. thats because i am

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Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

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Do you like fishsticks? Yes I personally think they are high in saturated fats, but to each his own Oh I thought you were asking if I was homosexual

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Q: what did the white man say to the black man? A: hi

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so a man goes to jurrasic park and sees two dinosaurs fighting. he shits himself.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and in turn wasting money

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Tic tac toe Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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Whats white and black and red all over? A panda that has just been shot by a poacher.

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my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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