Why was Timmy crying when he got home? His family was dead in a pile with a pitchfork going through each of their bodies

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Man I'm Bored Nice to meet you.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the flower say to it's friends? I want to kill a Christmas tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

France had one revolution

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why is it irrelevant whether someone is a twat or not? Love your neighbour.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was young Timmy Crying? Unfortunately he had a very rare but serious heart condition and he would probably die within a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's brown and smells like shit? Brown colour. I'm synesthetic.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the man say to the woman before he had sex with her? "May I have sex with you, please?"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why couldnt hellen keller drive a car? because she was a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Man says, "Hello" Girl, "Do you wanna go out?" Man, "With you?" Girl, "YES!" Man, "NO, bye!"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get slaughtered.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: Where do you go when its cold? A: A corner because its 90 degrees.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

jd and zach loves vigina

thumb_up thumb_down -15

i was scrolling through the anti-jokes and saw one that just said refridgerator. i laughed. penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Guess What!? What?! GIGGITY GIGGITY GOOOOOOOOO!!!!! (ALL RIGHT) OH.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's the difference between 10,000 dead babies and a Farari? I don't have a Farari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Its true... Chuck Norris has no hair on his balls. Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was the black man in Jail? He works there as a correctional officer.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What was big and stiff A 30cm ruler

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops