what happened when a duck flew over the hunter during duck hunting season? the hunter shot at the bird, but fortunately, the hunter was nit very good so the duck flew back to his wife and children by the pond.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What was the baker a coward? He didn't have the "Bunz" to prove it!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

You know what's worse than having a terrible boss? Being unemployed.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Lets just say that we are beyond the stage where I am "just" trying, by the way, you might want to search that last comment for double negatives. Or you know NOT NOT. Do not take my word for it, but if I am not wrong, the bacteria (yogurt) leaves afterwards, so you are eating milk that has been eaten and then.. You know... A common "side effect" of hypnosis, is that when it is used, the one hypnotized (both in this case) end up feeling a "strange" case of closeness, stronger bonds, friendship etc, scientists wonder why... ITS LIKE DUH! WE BOTH REVEAL DEEP SECRETS TO EACH OTHER! THINGS WE DO NOT EVEN USUALLY TELL OURSELVES! Its a literal no brainer, scientits can go fuck themselves, because as far as I know, thats the only fuck they ever get.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Whats two plus two? Miles

thumb_up thumb_down -12

KNOCK KNOCK WHOSE THERE? AVOCADO AVOCADO WHO AVOCADO COLD THAT'S A RETARD JOKE HAHAHAHAHA GOOD 1

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Man: Would you like to see someone Man 2: Sure Man: How bout the inside of an ambulance

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A bar walks into a man and the man walks into a watermelon then the watermelon walks into a black guy then the black guy walks into a piece of fried chicken then the piece of fried chicken walks into a hotdog then the hotdog walks into a wall then the wall walks into a horse then the horse walks into a jar of mayonaise then the jar of mayonaise walks into a can then the can walks into the bar

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's black and white and red all over? An embarrassed skunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the horse insult the postage stamp? He didn't. Horses can not speak English nor can anything verbally or physically critique a postage stamp and make it feel any emotional distress.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red, Violets are purple.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the Taxi crash? The cab driver was trying to remove the frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

guess what what that wasnt it

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Stick figure says to the artist "Can't you make it any bigger?" Artist:"No, I ran out of lead?"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

roses are red so is ur face dont look at me like im a crazy bitch

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Ask me if my names Troy. Is your name troy? No, it's Roy.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

how do you have sex? i dont know im under age!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Good job, son.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did my toaster break? because it was made in china

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Did you hear about the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13 for sexual content/nudity, language, and some violence.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry Show me your tits

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: why did the dad drop his baby? A: she was slippery.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops