What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

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Q:How do you kill a blonde? A:The same way you kill everyone else.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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Q. What is Black, White, and Red all over?? A. A girl just having sex and her Cherry broke all over your dick..

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What is wrong with being a black Jew? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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Trouble with the trolley, eh? No

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Q: What do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

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Why did the man get frustrated searching through a box of forks? He was looking for a spoon.

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A man walks in front of a bus. The bus driver avoids the man but hits the boy eating ice cream.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Nope.

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In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies on fire and a pile of living babies on fire? The dead babies are usually not as loud.

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What?

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an alien is walking down the street he can't breathe our air and quickly suffocates and dies

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A 3 year old child walks into his parents having intercorce the child asked "mommy what were you and daddy doing" she says "sex" the child was scarred for life.

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Why did the patient die of aids disorder? Butt sex. Lots and lots of butt sex.

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Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

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If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

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Why couldn't timmy brush his hair? He had leukaemia

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The early bird gets the worm. The rest of them die of starvation.

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What do you call a cat without a face ? - Kitty !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops