Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm bad at poetry, ELEPHANTS!

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PENIS :)

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

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What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

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What was so sad about the white woman who dropped her Starbucks? It fell on her baby in a nearby stroller giving it third degree burns, disfiguring its face.

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What do you get when you cross a vampire and Adolf Hitler? A socially unacceptable and awkward hybrid of two unrelated, technically dead things.

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What happened when Chuck Norris jumped into the pool? He then got water on him, and later had to dry off.

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A White guy invites his Black friends into his house, he says "Make yourself at home." THEY DO

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A woman has sex with an Asian man, then a white man, and then a black man. She chooses to be in a relationship with the black man because he is prepared for the responsibilities of a relationship and the other two men, though both are well endowed, are not ready.

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Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

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What do you call a black airline pilot? An airline pilot.

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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A police officer asks a witness of a murder what he witnessed. The man replies "A murder"

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Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

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What is the pirate's favorite letter? Z.

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What do a banana and helicopter have in common? Neither is a police officer

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What did the little asian boy get for his birthday? To work for minimun wage making high quality shoes for greedy white people in North America who dont care about anybody but themselves.

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how do u wake up lady gaga? poke her face

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Last week, I visited the Virgin Islands. Now it's just called Islands.

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So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

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How did the man kill the black fly? He called the KKK fly and had it lynch the black fly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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