What did the Triceratops get for his birthday? Nothing. Dinosaurs are extinct.

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What do Gary Glitter and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both successful pop stars

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to go to heaven because his girlfriend Margaret was cooked into chicken sandwhiches, and he had no kids and he didn't want to marry someone else, so he tried to get ran over but no cars hit him so he cooked himself. AND so he became KFC-Style chicken wings. BUUUT since no one ate them, he grabbed them up from heaven and commented on how delicious he was and proceeded to eat more and then exploded, sending him to heaven's heaven. But it was just a dream. And Margaret had to do laundry some more today because he freaking caused a urine tsunami. You're welcome.

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What do Batman and Harry Potter have in common? Their parents are dead.

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What do you call someone who copies a previously posted anti-joke without doing any research to see if it has been posted before? a lazy good for nothing rectum licking testicle sucking gonad gobbling arse bandit with narcissism issues

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What did the little girl who's parents died in a car accident get you her birthday? Foster Parents

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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It's porn, we all knew that, do you have something interesting to say?

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Two fish in a tank one said "How do you drive this thing?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit halfway by a car.

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How do chinese families name their children I belive it would be child because chinese families are only allowed 1 child

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Sasquatch. Sasquatch who? ROAR

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Wolfjob.

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Donald Trump.

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Why did the man cross the street? Because no cars were coming and he wanted to get to the othher side

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Q: what smells like cheese and tastes like cheese? A: cheese

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The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

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Why is the chicken afraid of the tiger? Chickens are inferrior to tigers and could easily be eaten.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? The 2 nouns in the sentence has been switched.

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Chuck Norris doesn't just have a chin underneath his beard. He also has part of his neck underneath his beard.

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roses are red violets are indigo

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Q: What did the passengers think of thier Chineese bus driver? A: They were very pleased with the bus driver's service, for he was a very safe driver and got them to their destination on time.

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What does an otter and a pencil sharpener have in common? They both feature in this joke

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how does a chinese chick check if she's pregnant? swallows a rubix cube and if it comes out solved shes pregnant

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops