What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

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how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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What did the little boy get on christmas morning? Cancer.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

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A man quites his job to open a coffee shop which has been a dream of his for years, The shop does well with a healthy supply of customers and a steady income,The man is now financially stable.

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Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

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Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender doesnt serve her because she is 12.

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a black man walks out of popeyes

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

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What is black and bad for your teeth? A cannon ball

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What does a man want more than sex? Nothing.

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Why did the black guy wear a hat? To keep the sun out of his eyes

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If your name is coincidentally stated in this text, you will have to pay 200 of your country's currency to the person nearest to you whose first name starts with the letter G. Dexter / Ryan That is all....

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Why Did The Boy Fall Off The Swing? Because He Had No Arms.

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Q: Why was the balloon scared of unicorns? A: Buses dont exist therefore the balloon was just insane.

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What do you get when you cross a sheep with a lion? A dead sheep.

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Q: Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? A: Neither did she...

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Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears Because he's a rabbit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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