What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

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Two guys walk into a bar.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh yeah... You're mute.

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What do you call a bloody Jewish guy nailed to a piece of wood. Jesus

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A young black guy was explaining how he was raised by a single mother

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whenever you come out of emma browns bedroom

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Roses are red violets are blue suck my **** and I'll **** you too

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Three peasants were brought in front of the King to be rewarded for their assistance during a drought. The King told them that they could each request one thing from him that he could provide. The first man asked to be rich, so the King ordered his guards to fetch a large sack that was filled to the brim with gems and gold pieces. The man thanked the King and left his palace joyfully. The second man asked for a larger house so the King gave him access to one of his many castles. He hurriedly left, eager to try out his new home for size. The third man asked for a cat so the King gave him a cat.

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Q: What did the blind boy get for his birthday? A: He doesn't know

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Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

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How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

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What poops,smells bad,burps,wears diapers,farts,and screams spank me with a bib on That Depends what you do on saturday nights

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Why did Jerry Sandusky appeal his conviction? Because the judge wrongly considered inadmissible evidence.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

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What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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Ding Dong! Who's the - - - wait - - - I don't have a doorbell.

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monster under your bed? thank god im in your closet...........

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Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

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Why did the seagull fly over the sea, It had wings.

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what does the muslim guy say in a very busy metro station? jaallalalalalalalalla BAM

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home

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Charlie Sheen

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Yo mamma so fat We are all seriously concerned for her health

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops