hey i just met you and this is c r a z y , but im a pirate so call me matey ;)

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How do you know it's a bad day? When your brain does not release a high enough level of seratonin.

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Hey, i just met you. And this is crazy! But im on bathsalts ! *GAUH* Your face looks tasty!! :D

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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There's 2 guys in a Y shaped road. One road leads to a cliff with deadly alligators below the river. The other road leads to the village. You can ask both of the guys one question to which leads to the village. However, one guy always tells the truth and the other guy always tells a lie. How do you get to the village? GPS

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A mexican and a black were in a cop car. Who was driving it? The Mexican, he was a cop and the black person was his assistant.

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Why do all gingers get mad all the time except having sex? Because they enjoy it!!!

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Q: What did ine sweaty arab man say to the other sweaty arab man? A: "I'm sweaty"

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- What do you call a black pirate? + A Nig-ARRRRRRRRRR - No, a pirate you fucking racist

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Yo mamma's so fat, we are all seriously concerned for her health.

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do,Nt loagh at me I has dislecqsia

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Thanks superman! Oh this is just what a regular Clark Kent would do... Uh... I mean... Dont worry Superman I know you arent Clark Kent, I just wonder why you work for him all day... Moral: What? What moral? What what?

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Q: what do u call a hotdog that's not cooked? A:a raw hot dog

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Oh, And one of them has a penis.

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A person from Singapore eats

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what did the white guy say to the black guy at the homeless shelter? Hi.

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knock knock whos there? nobody

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What do you call a polar bear in the desert? Bobby Marksson.

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What's green, yellow, and red? A traffic light

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nothing drews nose is f**ing hilarious

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How do you get rid of an STD? You give it to someone else.

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What's more depressing than watching a worm watching to worms

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Q: how do you catch a bear? A: you dig a hole, fill the hole with ashes, surround the hole with peas, and when the bear comes to take a pea kick him in the ash hole

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Once upon a time there was a pure and beautiful girl who lived with her step-mother and her two step-sisters. They made her live in the basement and had her do all the chores while they went to parties. Then social workers came and relocated her to a foster family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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